Casey Hallas Art

The Birth of Madness

I woke up this, so many like
When I was told, by my dear mom
That her divorce was not my fault
Oh no my dear, I realize, you broke my heart
And tore apart the thing that made me
Good, and beautiful, your pride requires
Service to pain, but I won’t ask
For you to hold me, or give me comfort
I only hold you to your task
Defined as female, a mother’s role
To hold her child and know its soul
You failed me, mine, a generation
You’re not the thing you claim to be
The keeper of humanity
Instead, greed just as men you say
Who hold you down to keep you weak.

Delusions of Illusions of Grandeur

I met a man inside my mind
Who told me that I should always hide
And ask from life to witness mine
The pain created from the loss
Of innocence the best machine
To save my being from deform
The love I held, and truth I learned
From loss, that pain of it
Was worst of all, so not to love
And not to share myself with those
I cared for most would save them from
The price of love, which is to lose
By force or death, the thing that makes
True love exist, family most
Death comes next, and abuse expect
In pursuit of knowing absolute

Delusions of Illusions of Grandeur

In speaking of the roles of sex,
What one may be, another not
I don’t believe I ever was, or was taught
That I was better than
Perhaps more that I was less
Not to object, but listen more
And heard a list of reasons why
Men were bad and women best
And shied away from showing lust
Showing any sign of what I felt
Instead of taking easy prey
Thought more of what my love would make
Responsible to honor her
And feelings from the acts of sex
Become my own, to carry home
Before I left my very own

Delusions of Illusions of Grandeur

So that if you met me 16 or more
Contemplating such of who I was
As a man, or a soul trapped in
Lover of the fairer sex, concluded
That a woman, free, given choice
Was empowered, certainly
To express desire, because the past
Men did so openly against her will.
If some did show me, did not in words
I suppose that was the way they spoke
I didn’t know, instead would wait
Until present day, I spent many days
And many nights, drinking beers
By myself, in 20 years only 5
That I recall took the steps
To express those words.

Delusions of Illusions of Grandeur

After all this time, spent alone
Lost in thought, falling off
And through the cracks
The one I thought deserving love
Started fading from my life
Not so wanted after all
The modern man so sure I was
Instead, the very thing declared amiss
The confident and alpha man
Always gets exactly what he wants
So either I am not desired
Or more one to inspire
Discomfort in who I had become
The unwanted kind, who drank too much
The creepy kind who felt too much
Not that MY feelings were worth so much

Delusions of Illusions of Grandeur

So from this stance
And with these eyes
Even when as drunk as I
Could manage through my life’s pursuits
Find so few I think a match
First that I find so beautiful
And less that say and speak like me
Instead want love, and materials
And an undying listful ear
And service to all your many needs
As you’ve come to ask of men you meet
Those who do so, in seeking you
The service of your secret parts
Instead of fully matching mind in turn
My former loves and girls I’ve met
Yet to behold the one who sees

Delusions of Illusions of Grandeur

Because you could see my body’s form
It’s average height and overweight
A handsome face, or so I’m told
Once I heard like movie star’s
To think you want what will I hold
To wait, and hope, and beg for love
Without making common steps
Perhaps it was so simple as
And it was mine alone to make the move
And she, holds power, unbeknownst
To decide who she shares her bosom with
It seems, she chooses fool instead
And one like me will go away
For fear of love, for fear of lust
In honor of the love was taught
Exists so purely inside your heart

Delusions of Illusions of Grandeur

I won’t back down, and now surmise
Instead of seeking better minds
A pretty girl can take her pick
Of all the men who come her way
In lines, all life, without showing her desire
A man like me, to not see
Who I became, what I believe
Is possible, responsible
I shake my head and fall in love
With all the girls so beautiful
But hold them to the task of their request
Equality, practiced in all of life
I am wrong, and I admit
Except in when one really asks
Are you good enough to be inside
I say too, while watching all the girls

Delusions of Illusions of Grandeur

I watch you work, and look for signs
Of what may come to be your mind
In knowing what you do possess
And if you have words or guess
What I may be, what I may see
What I hope for love to be
It comes to pass, perhaps you knew
That a man, 20 years past whence began
Can spend the night, just as fine
With someone then an age far less
Because the face and form stays still
And if you passed before me once
And came to love the man I was
Saw the light inside my eyes
And guessed the man I would become
I break hearts by staying still

Delusions of Illusions of Grandeur

To be the man you always dreamt
Existed, real – before your eyes
Not behaving, not expressing
What so obvious to everyone
Who is desired most of all
I see that, and see what’s more
The work a women makes to be
Beautiful inside her self
The price you must have seen in life
Your work to seek a man alike
Your beauty and your powerful mind
Accepting less, like I decide
Is far too short than making love
With someone deeply connected to
By working hard, and saying less
Before sharing bodies only eyes

Delusions of Illusions of Grandeur

These eyes, and yours
In focused gaze, say more than most
In how they’ve searched
More than most can say with words
The power of a secret heart
The spirit of a man from life
Listening, contemplative
Of all they say is meaningful
Come to make his own advice
And what is true and what are lies
I am still so lonely and needing her
That will protect and hold me dear
And join with me in desperate love
A kind yet known to me in life
Absolute connection, truth
Strength, from only my own design

Delusion of Illusions of Grandeur

A face, and words
Gentle hands to make the art
A chest with hair and heart within
That beats with love, and seeks the pure
Expression of a beauty true
Like I believed was possible
Myself the same through all the work
And finally free from my own disguise
That led me here to require
Myself to be both king and child
I am a king to you alone
A child too for you to hold
Protect my soul, make it glow
Together we make beauty live
Being what most never know
Designed from light beyond our world

Delusion of Illusions of Grandeur

I chose you, most wonderful
Your form and self, built from faith
In someday come to meeting me
I did my best to protect the hearts
From my body, but not myself
I use my suffering, breaking hearts
Not expressing the feelings true
All along my life’s pursuits
Becoming this, I now exist
And do not hide what I declare
To be a hero, to be a king
For you to make a world begin
Be here with me, set me true
I will not take less than what I am
Beautiful, and true so rare
One who could have done unkind

Delusion of Illusions of Grandeur

I am made to be a witness
I have friends who never failed
Without needing me to say such things
The I saw, the one to come
Of how I would, once, become bright
And everyone who couldn’t see
Would then decide to show me love
I’m not foolish, but I’m kind
But everyone I ever met
Most of whom I’ll not forget
I take power from what was mine
My power I had set aside
To witness how the true were that
And how the false, the ugliest
You were either one who loved
Or one who failed, you will know

Delusion of Illusions of Grandeur

Remember me? Recall my face?
Recall my name, recall my search?
Can you imagine one like me
Who used himself to build a fire
Igniting hearts, inspiring minds
To become the light of truth on Earth
To destroy greed and artifice
That cheats and breaks
All rules to win, while promising
What it never gives
And never will and that is why
I went alone, to be a sign
Of what a man would come to mean
Absolute and powerful
Light emergent from his soul
I am human most of all

Delusions of Illusions of Grandeur

And once my songs, my voice is heard
My paintings known and my will
To give to all, the same, deserved
Instead of wanting more for me
Then you decide what I may be
A hero, hopes, for man and her
For workers, lovers, all the kind
But destruction to the greed domain
That led you monsters to discard
The very world, the very life
That gave the birth to what you hide
That horrible desire be loved
By someone beautiful in spirit too
You cannot receive this gift because
You do not give to humankind
You are this, this animal

Delusions of Illusions of Grandeur

Dangling carrots televised
To entice, create desire
To have the things so every day
So many slave in life to have
When one like me comes next to you
You sneer and show I cannot be
Like you, because low birth
Or unless I give up truth
My gentleness, I learned to this
What I can’t have
The mistake you’ve made
Was in an estimate
Of what a man could want to come
I’ll never be your salesman
How could I after all I’ve lost
Most of all, love through life

Delusions of Illusions of Grandeur

I am firstly what you see
Dirty, working in my dress by choice
But all that was, and all I make
And what I’m after to this day
To tear apart the world I see
A mind beyond your precipice
Of what a poor man could design
And beauty, beyond measure mine
As I begin to shine my light
All the love I bring to me
The trust the struggling need to have
I am theirs, in servitude
Challenge me, my pedigree
You cannot break my mind apart
The work I’ve done destroying lies
Birth of madness, nothing more.

Delusions of Illusions of Grandeur

Everything is Ugly Now

In the Golden Age, the villages,
Free of disease, food grew on trees.
The land belonged to everyone.
There were many gods for choosing from.

Everything is ugly now.

Come together let’s plant these fields –
With food for more to congregate.
Consider one to decide the fate
And keep us safe, said the loudest man.

Everything is ugly now.

With all of them, when crops had failed,
A violent man, in another town,
Saw plenty grain was stashed away –
Let’s use these stones and take what’s ours.

Everything is ugly now.

Declaring they were chosen ones
The warriors went to Babylon –
With books they wrote and said with swords
Forever more it was their home.

Everything is ugly now.

Because murdering is powerful,
Taking slaves effectual,
And fear of God convenient too –
Senators divine with force proclaimed.

Everything is ugly now.

We the richest born to rule –
Taking all the most effective rules,
Critics of the church should die.
Even if hypocrisy is rule of law.

Everything is ugly now.

Universe observant put to death,
Unless truth proven profitable,
Divine right formed new kingdoms there
Lands that once belonged to tribes.

Everything is ugly now.

With stronger ships, the men sailed west.
To their surprise they found a place
Not yet seen in sailing maps.
There, said savage, lived a Golden Age.

Everything is ugly now.

Without same weapons overmatched,
Gold and silver plundered there.
Mass murder by disease and hate
A great land grab began with new lords born.

Everything is ugly now.

With no concern for hunter’s herds
The buffalo were driven off the cliffs.
And without food to feed themselves
Tribes were moved to lesser lands.

Everything is ugly now.

Freedom there, a country born,
From conquered become conquerer.
Without land for peasantry
Floods of men sailed ‘cross the sea.

Everything is ugly now.

The cleverest of the newly made
Figured how to amass great wealth.
Labor paid just to subsist
Until they gathered for demands.

Everything is ugly now.

When they felt they had enough,
Those comforted new family men
Believed in life beyond the grave
Accepted fate and fought for home.

Everything is ugly now.

The masses still led to believe
The Christian church was built on love,
Feared questioning the trinity
Despite the law, by rule of mob.

Everything is ugly now.

From liberty, new slavery
Printed books, and songs emerged
Of ancient days when once there lived
Rebels, heroes, many gods.

Everything is ugly now.

Belief in chances to be free
Tribes from every corner of the world,
Some by armies forced from homes
New citizens accepted not by old.

Everything is ugly now.

But never were there savages
And never were they truly kings.
Never was there one true god
His story cleverest deceit.

Everything is ugly now.

For if the God described as love
In everything existing such
All creation emergent from
The gay, the dark, deserved all.

Everything is ugly now.

Questioning the powerful
Respond in force by using fear
This not what messiah taught
That rich were low, the meek should reign.

Everything is ugly now.

Our beauteous world in jeopardy
Replaced by plastic thrown away.
Considering all that has transpired –
6 wealthiest prove money god.

Everything is ugly now.

For the land is never owned
And none of us deserving more
The greatest force of humankind
Is how belief controls the mind.

Everything is ugly now.

For if the land is truly owned
And some of them deserving more
Violence, fear the only means,
Protecting told inheritance

Everything is ugly now.

The same remains to be reborn,
That murderers will always rule.
That peace just moments of a life,
Faith in those destroying earth.

Everything is ugly now.

Collecting wealth is not the crime,
Nor wanting future family.
But without asking what’s deserved
By everyone in governed is.

Everything is ugly now.

For if you ask them what they want
Or believe your skin or origin best –
A free man questions what you say
Because he feels freedom within.

Everything is ugly now.

Propagate your dominance,
Using faith or governance –
The ones born free of hateful thoughts
With same means now defend Oneness.

Ugliness there was once found.

We born free now greatest minds
Proof color, just hue of skin;
Women equal, though not the same
All must choose what world they want.

And choose to challenge everything.

It’s JUST a Theory

So I didn’t sleep last night
I took some medicine that helped me think
Contemplating my state of loneliness
About how not joining in the game
Leaves me wondering if it’s not
Meant to keep you soft.

Perhaps, it’s just a theory

The philosopher who seeks the truth
Really questions empowering means
Will come to reflect on dichotomy
Of man and women, witnessing
The he said she said of it all
Or is it just she said she said?

Ah, it’s just a theory

They say he cannot feel in force
That’s not been my experience though
The prophets are his sex and 
Though she says she’s powerless
It seems more that she wants it all
And hates encroachment on her domain

Emotion, just a theory though

Constructed meaning, the liberated
Sought to seeking pleasure most
Without responsibility, without class
In society no work’d get done
So it’s best to have some rules
As long as she’s got a say at home

Power, it’s theoretical

Power most is family bond
Commitment based on reasoning
The heart alighted by emboldened speech
And while she may have words to say
She’s not as loud or believable
Reasoning not her harvest, most

Feelings are, in theory, said

Beyond protection for himself
And those he loves, she must
Come first, and so it goes
Because she choses not to work
Not because of capacity but
Just her greatest vice is greed

Perhaps, it’s just a theory

Who wants to work? Not I
Though I take pleasure from the truth
The truth of power is in lust
Believing you can own a thing
She convinces you that she is yours
But always searching for the best

Not too hard, in theory though

Not knowing this, a man will toil
He’s noble after all, for his
Heart, those he trusts
Beating her to close her eyes
Is for her, beneficially
To suppress desire

Uncontrollable, by her sex

Wanting all, except to work
But to discuss, not truth
But lies, her best kept tool
Creating meaning with her spies
The henhouse clucks, words
About those who stand

In question, observationally

The nature of the world
The most liberated of her sex
The whore in reverence
Held by men, her beauty
To dispense at will and with ease
To be paid, for what comes free

Easy work, theoretically

She does not care much for his face
Adapted to desire, power most
The jealous ones of the easy life
Make this practice hard to get
Hard to get is what she wants
An easy life, for less beloved

Getting fucked, that is best

She picks an easy target first
One kept happy for a time
Until her greed, because of sloth
She offers him her arguments
Conflicts, emotion-based
A just return, not, for his toil

Unconsciously, or common law?

Her womb is what she’s offering
In exchange for room and board
Perhaps, biological imperative
For a time, until at least another
Man comes along with promises
True or not, a good way out

Truth, it’s just a theory

The promise of it compels her to
Leave her home and leave her man
Risking everything just for a chance
For more ease, for more things
She can always come back home
The poor man, he has a heart

She loves him, theoretically

Perhaps a construct of her own
To bypass accounting for her thoughts
Love believed to be the means
To keep her there, except what’s true
So easily she’s stole away
By betterment, while she waits

It’s good enough, for now

Serving yourself better though
When these arguments arise
Tell her that, your reason sound
To leave your house, sophistry
Is for the weak, not I
Go sell herself, if it’s ripe

Or shut your fucking mouth

She requires you play along
Desiring her, she is the prize
Always chased by lonely men
Who think the wife, her to be kept
She’s keeping score, nothing less
Discussing secrets behind your back

A whore is better company

At least she’s honest about her work
And when she’s done she’s got a tale
And she can keep men, conversationally
With song and jest and merriment
Reasonable and satisfied
By giving what is really best

Pleasure, and true respect

Did you taste her, it was prime
I got a discount because I whined
Come now friends let’s find the truth
Instead of wasting time with this
Emotion manipulates
A lazy cunt, not equal work

Her womb is all that you require

Theatrical are her displays
But that’s not fair, her eyes betray
The double-speak that she’s about
Requiring you make compromise
Because she thinks you’ve fallen pray
To her loveless love parade

Perhaps, it’s just a theory though

Now, there are exceptions
Transcendent ones, they see too
Through all the veils, perhaps deserved?
Just like you and playing games
A waste of time she wants a man
To take her mind

With theory, thought and truth

And lie with you to talk about
Witnessing the sorrows of life
Existential pain you feel
Because you see it’s not that real
The stories told to keep us fat
Really aren’t the best ones out

Whatever, it is easier though

In liberation then, one of her sex
Sees not just size but thoughtfulness
Karma holds the hand of truth
Science is the surest path
For equal quantitively agreed
If the lazy made to work

Instead they shake their ass about

Fundamentally, they don’t care
Well, some that is, but most let’s say
If the truth is what you speak or not
Believing what they want to hear
Is easier than seeking truth
So men become like them instead

Disappointing, to say the least

Complaining, wasting time
Creating emotions to distract
That’s not fair, oh really Miss?
What’s your research? Do you
Pick and choose what suits
Best your emotionally constructed bed?

You fucking whore, open wide

Perhaps the patriarchs
Are not quieting the wives
But protecting all, from her vice
To use her body with little yield
Actual laboring, why should I
I’ve got tits, I’ve got lips

One set spits, one set’s wet

Now after all of this is said
What type of man desiring most?
The one who goes to her
And honestly says he wants
To take her to his bed tonight
Concerned with nothing of her life

A weak man serves her well enough

Brow beating him, while keeping watch
“Innocent” enough a sport she plays
Welcoming desire when she is tired
Carefully though so he’s not aware
They’re such cheaters, men, they say
Not really, women manipulators first

He’s crazy, perhaps you made him so

Creating meaning, love and faith
To keep him trapped conveniently
While saying you want equality
Take little of the heavy weight
To help someone who’s not your friend
Your friend is who you talk about

Create dissent, it’s easy bait

Emotions are a response
To the unknown, silent attack
Deciding that you are done
While leading him to some new
Place, perhaps, will make you happy
Now, nah, didn’t work, nor did you

Instead you just talked about

She could stand up, take the yolk
Not shying from the law or thought
That is beautiful, men agree
Her claws, a pen, her desire
To think, the glass ceiling that exists
Isn’t pay, it’s to lead

At least, is theoretically

We welcome you, we want you to
We’re sick of games, we’re sick of lies
We’re sick of double-speak and fakes
We’re sick of toiling while another class
Creates the thoughts that keep us bound
Stand wrestling, dear with the concerns

Ah, it’s just a theory

True love is love of everyone –
All life, sentience, a mind is not
Gendered in the thoughts it sees
Only qualities, prescribed –
Sexuality is truth, it helps
Release our emotional concerns

Unless you’re too tired, love

A woman’s body built for lust
She can climax time and time again
So, perhaps, it’s not that she’s a prude
But she’s the reason for the fear
Unless she can, use her spine
And stop requiring men their backs

Coats, to cover up the rain

And truly what she fears the most
And still not turn her eyes away
The leader of a band, poets, wanderers
Who live the truth of love in full
Because the enlightened artists can
Experience all things in such short time

Because they’ve put their spirit in

Not buried under furniture
In clothes or jewelry, it’s so fine
Really, it’s useless without desire
Pick up a fucking shovel girl
Help me grow, together we
Can share the joy of sharing life

Move on in time, like a man

A man, he honors what he makes
He’s loyal to experience
And hurts the most when he’s betrayed
And that seems happens most of all
Because his girl will not disclose
How she feels, responsibly

Perhaps, it’s just a theory

The New World in society
Without ownership perhaps
Because in equal competiviness
Without displacing faith in Christ
The Great Creator, not named a man
A woman’s rivals fell away

Perhaps, it’s just a theory

If everyone, expressing lust
Expressing joy, sharing trust
Committed to the common good
In watchfulness, prepared for flight
What is better, I just ask?
Because bitches bitch, then you die.

Together, we are one.